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It Would Be You

1 year later

Shanell

It’s been a year now since I’ve worked for OK Magazine. I went hard to prove that I’m a good employee who goes above and beyond to do my job. I stayed late on nights other’s went home. Every celebrity I was asked to get for our magazine I was successful at it even ones I wasn’t asked to get. I worked through breaks, my lunch time and now my hard work has finally paid off. I went from being the one going out in the field pitching the magazine to interviewing and writing the story on the clients. They did give me a trial period first before I was officially promoted but I got through that with flying colors. This job has really challenged me a lot as far as growth. I’ve had to really get out there and prove myself. Taking risk that I usually wouldn’t have done. Putting myself out there to show our clients how we can work for them by exposing them to a demographic that they might not touch otherwise. I’m making a name for myself and I’m not as fearful of having people know who I am. I’ve built a good rapport with the clients that I’ve interviewed and some of them have sent me referrals.

Trey was trying to get in touch with me, after I left, but I just couldn’t talk to him. I felt like if I did I would’ve had second thoughts and just prolonged the inevitable. I left him
one message telling him that I’m fine and my leaving was something that I needed to do for me. If he ever loved me than I know he understands and won’t hold it against me. I let him know that I wanted him to be happy to the fullest, so know that I left bearing no hard feelings and I hope he doesn‘t have any for me. I told him that he was the best thing to ever happen to me and leaving him again, was not an easy thing to do, so that’s why I haven’t returned his calls until now. I just wanted him to know that I will always love him and I miss him and to take care of himself. Which I’ve noticed he has been doing.

Replied To: Story - Does She Know (Forum topic)
On: Jul 14, 2011

Love you guys responses..thanks for taking part in the discussion....there are no right or wrong answers here because we all are entitled to our own opinion and views. I just wanted to turn it into more of a discussion and hear/read your point of views.

I hope you continue to enjoy the story as it unfolds. :)

Replied To: Story - Does She Know (Forum topic)
On: Jul 13, 2011

sex-pp

I know it’s not fair to him, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I can’t get past this yet. I’m sorry that I couldn’t be the kind of woman that he needed me to be, but I’m not sorry for loving him enough to let him go. I continue to look in his eyes.
“Baby I wish you could fix it…”
“You can’t leave me Shanell…I need you baby…leaning in closer to my lips…I need you…whispers…I love you…” Trey started kissing my lips and giving my ears and my neck small pecks. My body was too weak to stop him, so I didn’t. He made love to me for the last time that night. I woke up in the middle of the night and cried in the bathroom as I wrote him a note saying how much I love him, but I had to leave for reasons that he may not understand right now. I wrote by no means was this easy for me to do and I pray that one day he can find it in his heart to forgive me. The next morning Trey woke up to see an empty side of the bed. He spotted my note and read it. Then he grabbed his cell phone to call me.

Shanell baby I heard everythang you said last night and I do understand how you feel…but I still think we can work this out…it’s not as hard as it seems…baby I love you…and I know you love me…I know it…can you pick up the phone…ok…maybe you not up yet but can you please return my call. I know we can make this work baby…just give us a chance…I love you “click”

*******
Questions

Ladies if you were in Shanell's position would you be strong enough to walk away from Trey or any relationship that was high profile? Could you be strong enough to stay true to yourself? Was she wrong for leaving? What are your thoughts?

Replied To: Story - Does She Know (Forum topic)
On: Jul 12, 2011

sec-oo

takes a deep breath “Trey I love you more than anything, but knowing myself I’ve realized that I’m not strong enough to deal with things like this…people constantly in our business trying to tear us apart…the security…paparazzi…the lies…”
“I ain’t never lied to you…”
“I’m not referring to you…Trey I’m use to my life being my own…not put under a microscope for everyone to see…I don’t like that…I just don’t think I can live like this.”
“You call that living…being afraid…stayin in a fish bowl all ya life.”
“It’s living for me…see…you don’t understand…this is what you wanna do Trey, the way you‘re willing to live your life because of your career…baby I thought I could too. I thought I could handle this fast pace, roller coaster, life on the road, and in the public eye, but the more I try, I find that I can‘t. It’s hard for me to allow the world to know who I am…what I’m doing…who I’m spending my time with.”
“How can you tell me you love me, but you’re not willin to take the good wit the bad...I guess you expect it to be all good huh?”
“How can you say that…I do love you…I love you enough to be honest with you about how I feel.” Trey punched the door. He did it so suddenly it made me jump. I’ve never seen his this angry before.
“What do you want me to do Shanell…if I could change that part about this business I would.”

I walked over to Trey and put both hands on his face the way I do all the time when I need for him to really hear me. In that instant looking in his eyes the tears fell from mine. I realized as much as I loved him I couldn’t be all that he needed me to be. He needed a woman who could handle being in the public eye and be that public figure just like him. I couldn’t. I wasn’t ready for that. I was put under a microscope for something that I didn’t do years ago and to this day I still haven’t fully recovered from that effect. I know it’s something that Treys not aware of but it’s still too painful to discuss.

Replied To: Story - Does She Know (Forum topic)
On: Jul 12, 2011

sec-nn

Trey follows me in there.

“Why you doin this?” I say nothing.
“Where you goin?” walking from the bathroom getting my toothbrush “Can you just stop so we can talk?” I stop and stare in his eyes and give him what he wants…to talk.
“This situation right here is not gonna work for me anymore.” Trey then realized that not only was I done with the argument but I was done with our relationship. He grabs my arm.
“Hold up! Whatchu sayin Shanell…you leaving me?”
“Trey look at us…we’re arguing…this is stupid…I know you trust me and I trust you…it’s just…”

Treys cell phone started ringing and he took it out of his pocket to look and see who it was since it was his business line. Along with his phone came out all the contents that was in his pocket, which were Chrystal’s number and a wallet size naked picture of Nikki. It fell on the floor and since I was standing right beside him I picked it up. Trey’s face was priceless when he saw it. He had no idea that’s what Nikki gave him.

“This is what you carry around with you…looking at the photo…wow…and here I am getting grilled for a photo of me holding hands…”
“Wait a minute Shanell lemme…” cuts him off
“Oh…and this…it makes since now…seeing the paper with the number…Crystal took that picture when we all went out together…looks at Trey…yeah I forgot to tell you…she’s ya numba one fan.” I handed Trey his picture and note.
“Hold up Shanell I had no idea dats what Nikki gave me…I never even looked at it…you gotta believe me.” I just looked at him shaking my head back and forth. I was hurting, but not for the reasons I’m sure he was thinking. I struggled and struggled to make this decision, but he just made it very clear the right thing to do.
“Thanks for helping me to figure out that this lifestyle is not for me. I really can‘t do this Trey.”
“Whatchu talkin bout?”

Replied To: Story - Does She Know (Forum topic)
On: Jul 12, 2011
Prittbrowniiz BestSellerAngel's picture
Member name: 
BestSellerAngel
About Me: 
I'm a independent woman & mother who strives 4 the best 4 myself & my fam. I luv 2 write & would luv 2 become a famous author, which is a dream of mine, & soon 2 bcome my reality. I've jus wrote my 1st book. I know it's a process, but at least I'm n the game & I play 2 win. I'm a new fan of Trey Songz. I've always heard his music, but it wasn't until I heard "Hood Love" by MJB featuring him, that piqued my interest about him as an artist. I have all his cd's now & I'm lovin the latest 1 PPP. I"ve said it b4 & I'll say it again Trey u inspire me as a writer. I luv ur work. I can honestly say that ur songs make me feel like ur talkin 2 no1 else but me. That feels so good, esp. when ur single & u've had a long day & u need that “pick me up" or somethin 2 jus remind u that there r sum good men out there. 2 have that ability is special which is truly what u r Tremaine Neverson. I have nothin but luv 4 u as a human being, artist, & a man. U make me smile Trey Songz. Lol:-) God Bless!
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